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Weird Ebay Sales: What Are People Trying To Sell Each Other?
by: Jesse S. Somer
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Recently I wrote an article entitled, ” Future Internet: Collaboration without loss of individuality: Example 1: Ebay”. Since then it has come to my attention that like all other areas of life the comedians and jokers have invaded and put their mark on this incredible new phenomenon. I am by no means against humour as I am a firm believer in the idea that laughter is the greatest medicine of all. If humanity just learned to laugh at ourselves a little bit more instead of taking everything in life so seriously, I think we could achieve both individual and social harmony much more quickly. There are several websites on the Internet already dedicated to weird things that have been offered and even bought on www.ebay.com. A few that I’ve seen are found at: http://www.whowouldbuythat.com/, http://www.weird-websites.com/WeirdEbay.htm and www.whattheheck.com/ebay/.
Certain eccentric as well as just plainly silly people have tried to sell anything from their own virginity (had to be a hoax) to the now infamous ‘ghost in a jar’. The ‘ghost in a jar’ sale was so popular that a whole slew of copycats have followed suit ranging from ‘ghost droppings’ to a ‘ghost in a bra’. The ‘What the heck’ site seems to have the most comprehensive list with items being categorised into: Fan favourites, People, Body parts and fluids, Animal Kingdom, Metaphysical Stuff, Face it you’re addicted to Ebay, Technology and accessories, Health and Beauty, Dirt, Water etc, Just plain evil, Gross, Weird inventions, and Stuff we’ve yet to categorise. One of my favourites is for the sale of Snow. Here’s what the seller had to say about the product:
“So far, we’ve got over a foot, and it’s still coming down. We really don’t need more than a few inches here, so we’re making the rest available to the highest bidder. Due to the perishable nature of snow, and because not even 4WD vehicles are having much luck on our local roads, the winning bidder must make arrangements for pickup. This snow doesn’t pack very well, so you’ll have to make your own packing arrangements as well. Note that I’m only offering the excess snow from our own property. If you need it, I may be able to arrange for you to get more. I’ll accept cash or money order for payment. If you clear a path from Interstate 40 to my house, I’ll discount your winning bid, charging only an amount equivalent to the Ebay fee for the closing bid. Take our snow, please…”
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I also laughed when I saw that drug-free urine, raccoon’s penis bones, the Internet (someone bid 1 billion dollars-it’s real worth would be priceless), nine used toothbrushes, dirt from the US civil War, a UFO Finder, a Russian sub (a real one!) and Absolutely Nothing were on sale. Here’s what the seller said about the latter:
“ABSOLUTELY NOTHING for sale, zero, zilch, nada. NO RESERVE on this vastly under appreciated commodity. Why suffer the disappointment of shelling out big bucks on junk you don’t want, can’t afford, and don’t need, when, for a small fee, you can completely bypass the disappointment! You expect nothing, and that’s precisely what you will get. I’m hoping I can build up a regular clientele for absolutely nothing, because finding nothing is much easier to acquire than most of the other items I sell. And shipping costs are minimal, because, well, nothing weighs nothing. And it’s very cheap for me to buy, as it costs me nothing. So forget about those Beamers, those houses in the suburbs, those electronic gadgets, those fashionable clothes that are outdated before you leave the store; THEY won’t bring you happiness, NOTHING will! The ancient Chinese Sage advised us that less is more. Therefore, NOTHING is most. Here is your chance to FINALLY get exactly what you’ve always deserved! Bid with confidence, becauseI guarantee NOTHING! Aren’t you weary of everyone whining that they can’t find NOTHING to buy? Well, here it is, ladies and gentlemen, step right up and mail me your dollars, I have an unlimited supply of what you really need most in your life, but were never quite sure how to acquire it. You could pay hundreds, thousands, even tens of thousands of dollars for the same thing from any one of a hundred political organizations, religious groups, or federally mandated taxing organizations, and not get one single thing that I’m not providing for a nominal fee of a $1.00 bid. And don’t despair if you get sniped out at the last minute this week, I’ll have a fresh supply available next week as well. Item is guaranteed to be exactly as described. California residents please add 8.25% sales tax.”
So, with every great step forward for humanity we have our tricksters helping us along with their great powers of humour. With Ebay a new way of collaborative consumerism has entered the so-called ‘first world’ psyche. The question is: Where do we draw the line between supply and demand for what we need to have a sustainable existence, and buying for the sake of addiction to shopping? I recently heard of a new term coined Affluenza. It is the disease of always wanting more money and material objects even if it means having a lesser quality of life. Hey, someone has even sold the ‘Meaning of life’ on Ebay for a mere $3.26!
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About The Author
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Jesse S. Somer http://www.m6.net
Jesse S. Somer didn’t like it when he saw that a girl was selling her ‘booger’ over the Web. However, in this girl he sees the power of creative imagination that is furthering our species’ consciousness.
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Copyright 2005 Gobala Krishnan
Amid all the noise and hype on the Internet today, not many people realize that all the ideas and techniques you can find are petty much useless if you don’t first understand your business model. In other words, even the most amazing Internet marketing technique will not work if you don’t understand how to apply it to YOUR business.
The 3 most popular business models are:
1) Affiliate Marketing
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This is perhaps the most popular one out there, since there are absolutely no barriers to entry. Almost anyone can sign-up for an affiliate program for free and start promoting the product or service on the Internet with hopes that someone will buy, giving them instant commissions. Affiliate marketers don’t carry any risk, since they do not pay for the creation of the product, they do not handle customer service and they do not need any up-front investments.
When you consider that those are the top three things people want to avoid, it’s no surprise that almost everyone and their neighbor promotes an affiliate program or another. In fact, if there is a single reason why the Internet today is so proliferated with ads and banners, it’s because of affiliate programs.
Even though there are so many affiliate marketers out there, only 5% ever make any money and only 1% makes big money. The “Super Affiliates” do it very differently from all the other millions; therefore they earn the big checks.
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You can get a good idea of how to be a good affiliate marketer here: http://affiliatemarketing.sitesell.com/globalmillionaire.html
2) E-book and Information Publishing
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Sitting at the other end of the spectrum, e-book authors need to be more disciplined in their approach to Internet marketing. Of course, they also need to invest more than affiliates do. While affiliates can get away trying to “get something for nothing” the same is not true for the e-book type of business.
If you’re thinking about publishing and selling your own e-book online, and you think it’s going to be easy, think again. You’ll need to learn a lot more than affiliates are required to. You’ll need to spend some amount of money getting your business up and running. However, when you do it right, the payoff in this online business model is much more rewarding.
The reason why e-book marketers and “Infopreneurs” make more money is simple; they have very, very low production and maintenance costs. Anything digital doesn’t cost a single cent to be produced in millions if necessary. Whatever initial start-up costs spent can be covered by selling just a few copies of high-margin e-books, and you can even recruit an army of affiliates who are more than willing to do all the selling for you.
Of course, it’s not as easy as it sounds, but the point is, when done properly, the “E-book Publishing” model is a truly profitable business.
You can learn more about e-book publishing at http://egoods.sitesell.com/globalmillionaire.html
3) Internet Based Network Marketing
I’ve heard many people say that the Internet and network marketing are a match made in heaven. In my opinion, though, almost 90% of people get it wrong when it comes to Internet based network marketing. People in this business usually think they’re talking about network marketing, but in reality they are talking about affiliate marketing.
They try to make the Internet do all the work. They hide behind their computers and pretend everything’s going great. They focus on selling more and more every month. They have systems that are so complicated only they can understand it. Well, that doesn’t sound like network marketing to me!
Internet based network marketing is simple if you understand it, and are willing to put in the effort. The role of the Internet here is only to get you the names and contact details of people you can talk to, after which YOU, not a computer, has to build a relationship with these people and help them to start their own business.
For this simple purpose, it is not necessary for you to have a high-tech system and pretend that your auto responder is building relationships for you. It’s not going to work. The key is to have simple systems that are duplicable, something you can teach to all those people you have built a relationship with. For this purpose I use NetMarkPro at http://www.netmarkpro.net/globalmillionaire and teach my own affiliates to use it too.
E-book authors, no matter what they say, have no obligation to teach you their “Secret Strategies to Become a Millionaire of any variations to that. The reason is simple; why tell you the absolute truth when you’ll end up as their competitor? No one wants more competitors, right?
Internet based network marketing is very much the opposite of that. You HAVE to tell people EVERYTHING you know or your business will never take off. For this reason alone, I always recommend that if you’re new to the online world, you need to first join an Internet based network marketing business at least to learn. Rest assured, no one will be selling you half-baked truths when their success ultimately depends on yours.
These are the Top 3 most popular online business models today. There are more, of course, and you can read about it at http://case-studies.sitesell.com/globalmillionaire.html
No matter which model you choose, make sure you understand the basics, and stop listening to and buying things that are not applicable to your business. Information overload can stop you before you even get started.
About the Author
Gobala Krishnan is an author and Internet based network marketer. Get his free report at http://www.MyInternetDream.com today and find out how you can achieve financial freedom on the Internet.
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